The Marriage Builder, the brainchild event of Reverend Mogomotsi Kabelo and his wife Pastor Precious Kabelo of Faith Covenant Ministries International has come out to challenge the perception that marriage is dying in Botswana.

This year, the 15th edition of the event attracted over 100 couples that gathered at TraveLodge in Gaborone.

Reverend Kabelo is of the view that social media has allowed people to judge marriage based on some of the most unfortunate incidents happening in it. He believes that the society has got some hard-work to do to ensure that the whole country is built on healthy families and marriages. The Marriage Builder started as a church programme, ‘Marriage Empowerment Sessions’ in 2007 and has since metamorphosed into a marriage empowerment brand, according to Reverend Molemosi Nkarabang. The event attracts couples from various walks of life. Nkarabang says this year’s edition did not disappoint but kept to the consistent aura and ambience of marriage building of the past years. “The Marriage Builder comes at a time when some people have somewhat given up on the marriage institution as either non-existent or a façade of keeping up appearances,” he said. The Marriage Builder, he added, creates a perfect platform to dispel such notions through marriage life changing interactions, presentations and discussions to revive, revitalise and rekindle the spark of marriage, something that the country at large needs for build

ing happy homes. This year’s theme: ‘Stronger Together,’ reminded both the married couples and the entire Botswana community that marriage can only work beautifully if everyone else takes responsibility to embrace it.

Reverend Kabelo emphasised that marriages need to be kept alive and watered everyday like trees. “People should make God the centre of their marriages, while addressing challenges they might have because no one is perfect,” he says. He quoted Proverbs 24:3-5, “By wisdom a house is built, And by understanding it is established; And by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches. A wise man is strong, and a person of knowledge increases power.” Their

empowerment sessions offer a platform for acquiring the requisite wisdom, understanding and knowledge to keep marriages alive. Contrary to popular belief, feelings and ‘butterflies’ alone are not enough to keep the marriage alive but a decision must be made to love one’s spouse and work intentionally at fanning into flames the marriage fire. While admitting that feelings are necessary at the initiation stages of a relationship, he admits that the challenges that come with marriage tend to weigh down on couples hence the need to intentionally work on loving a spouse. Guest speaker and also a marriage counsellor, Botho Ntswaneng, reminded the audience to be present in their marriages and make love every

day. She poetically dismantled the narrative of lovemaking and said that it goes on beyond the inner chambers. “The art of lovemaking is basically in everything we do for and with our spouses. Serving my husband breakfast, adorning the house, ironing his clothes is basically lovemaking, just like I enjoy looking at him when he fixes the car, packs bags in the boot, and mixes cattle feed. This is how we should embrace love on a daily basis,” she said. Pastor Precious on the other hand believes that people still respect marriage in Botswana but only need events like this one to be reminded of the purpose of marriage. She said 226 people attended the event this year, adding that they receive positive feedback from people every time after the event testifying that their marriages were rekindled. Another attendant, Pastor Tebogo Kenabatho has been to several editions of the Marriage Builder and keeps on coming back because of the relevant and practical lessons taught there. “A lot of people have given up on the institution of marriage. Some time back society upheld marriage as a basis for family but the scopes have changed altogether due to several vices that have eroded the institution of marriage including; divorce, betrayal, abuse and ‘passion killings’. “I come to the marriage builder seminars yearly because it’s one of the few settings where the essence of marriage is still put in perspective and where efforts are made on rebuilding the integrity of marriage,” she said.

She continued that the overrated disgruntlement on marriage is subtly eroding the fabric of family and bringing up a completely new untold social system that as a society we are not necessarily mentally equipped to survive under, hence the rise in moral degradation in the society that we see today.

The 2023 edition empowered the attendants on building a platform for agreement, forgiveness and sensuality in marriage. “We received insights on integrating spirituality and God in marriage. It was an absolute healing moment. We learnt ways of dealing with each other’s weaknesses as a united front and how to reduce on feeding the weaknesses,” Kenabatho said. Other topics covered included; mental health, decision making, financial health, God and marriage and lessons on love.

The Marriage Builder held to restore integrity of marriage